My disciples

I was going about my usual business last week, and I noticed something. It was not an unusual thing I noticed; it was something that happened all the time. It is a normal, everyday occurrence. What I noticed about this thing was something that God was speaking to my heart: I have my very own disciples, my little children.

I went outside to hang out the laundry, and my 7-year old, 5 year-old, and 3 year-old followed me out to play. As soon as I went in, they followed me inside. When I went to the store, they begged to come along. When I go to church, they are following me everywhere, to the point that if I turn around, I often trip on one of them! I must admit, regretfully, that I have often wished they could just “go play by themselves for awhile,” so I can get something done. But this past week, as we were at a missions conference and the Lord was working in my heart about the lost around the world, He very gently showed me the little ones in my home.

“These are your disciples,” God seemed to say. As I sat in my pew, with the preacher going on and on, I realized what potential I have been ignoring. Here I have with me on a daily basis, a small group of young people completely dedicated to following me in whatever I do. They love me and want to be with me. They want to do what I do, and learn from me. What an opportunity! I can pour good things into their moldable little lives right now that I will never be able to get in later on.

I asked the Lord for forgiveness for taking such a grave responsibility for granted, and asked Him for help to teach and direct them in the right way. I soon had my first test!

Saturday morning, it was time to clean the van. Now, you have to understand a little bit about us to understand the enormity of the task of cleaning the van. We have a large 15 passenger van, and it was extremely dirty on the inside from remnants of our 4 ½ month trip. I had cleaned it a few times during our trip, but it had been awhile, and if you can imagine a family of 8 living out of their van for a few months, you can begin to imagine the disaster which we called home for awhile. It was going to be a big job, and I knew it. This job would only be made bigger and more complicated if I added some small children to it. But I knew that not only did the van need cleaned, but also the children needed to spend some time helping me clean it, so we could work together. They need to learn that work is a daily occurrence.

So, we set out to clean the van. I had four helpers: all the way from the 11 year-old on down. It took all morning, and was lots of work, but in the end, we had a very clean van, and some happy kids! I told them I would give them a few caramels if they worked hard, and they sure did work to get those things! And my, did they enjoy them when they ate them! And what a clean van we have now! I made sure I told everyone how the little ones and I cleaned the van out, and all the big kids, and even Daddy oooo-ed and aaahh-ed over such a clean vehicle! How good that made those little kids feel!

They are learning each and every day. I try to drop little bits of wisdom, and now I am trying to have them work with me as we go about our days. How wonderful it is to serve God by investing of myself in my little ones! They are my disciples.

Has Your Son Asked Yet? Part 2

I’ve been looking for the proper time to get into “Has Your Son Asked Yet?” Part 2, but it’s been a long and difficult week or so. Has it been that long ago? As most of you know, we’ve been traveling, and have finally arrived home a week ago today. Well, unfortunately, someone brought their little sick child into church Thursday night, and we all came down with the stomach flu. With a family of little ones, it’s a messy time. Thank God for a washer, and a sweet husband!

Anyway, getting back to the topic of kids asking questions and our responses - our children have a lot of information they need to daily process into their brains. As a result, they have many conflicting reports, and even thoughts that are difficult to understand, depending on their age. And, as I said before, once they are old enough to see that our family does things differently than some other families, they wonder the age-old question, “why?”

It should not surprise us that they ask. Yet, for some reason, most of us are mortified by the question. I think the fear is related to personal failure. Let me explain.

I have a dear friend who e-mailed me, saying that,

“I also remember not knowing why we did certain things, and later learning the reason why from somewhere else and telling my mom. She would just say, "You knew that! I told you that already!" She indeed could have told me a lot of these things, but either I didn't get it or didn't remember. Also, if I asked about something she got impatient or mad and thought I was trying to rebel about it.”

Why did her mother get angry? Simple: she felt threatened. She had an awfully lot riding on that little gal, and if she didn’t turn out the way she thought she should, then it spelled failure for her as a mother. Her daughter’s simple question became a personal threat.

A flood of emotions instantly goes through my mind when one of my children questions why we do what we do. They don’t know? Where have they been all this time? Have I failed to communicate this to them? How unsettled are they on this? Is there anything else they are questioning? Are they questioning this because they don’t want to do it? Don’t they want to please God? Are they headed down a path of rejecting truth, ending in certain destruction? HOW HAVE I FAILED? All these emotions become balled up in our hearts and can come exploding out the mouth, and we can say ugly things to our beloved children, even accusing them of rebellion, when perhaps all they want is information.

This emotional, uncontrolled response will only drive a wedge between our children and us. Before long, they will stop asking questions, fearing the nuclear explosion that is sure to follow. But it will not help them come to a proper conclusion in the matter in question.

If we are prepared in advance for the questions when they come, it will surely help us to field them. How can we prepare? 1) Be much in Prayer 2) prepare – study up on your convictions. Be sure they are convictions before enforcing them on your family. 3) remember how the Lord led you to that conviction, and be prepared to tell your children. And 4) Make sure your explanations are rational and logical. Many young people think they are rational, for the most part, and want to have things explained to them as though they are able to think through some difficult topics logically. Encourage them to understand that submitting themselves to God is their “good and reasonable service.”

The Bible says, “bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” Blowing up at them is not nurture, nor is it biblical admonition.

Let’s ask the Lord to help us know how to answer our children, so that we can lead them in the right paths.

SAVE 30% OFF MEAT!

Biblicalwomanhoodonline.com is doing Frugal Fridays, so I am participating when I can think of a frugal tip!

Anytime I can save money, especially on meat, it is a blessing! I found that the Walmarts in my area mark their meat down 30% on Thursday, to make room for the shopping rush on Friday & Saturday. If I went early enough (they begin marking down at 6:30am!), I could get many different cuts of meat for 30% off Walmart price, which is already usually pretty low.

A few months ago, I went to the meat department and asked them when they mark their meat down and they told me. It has been a real savings for our family!

WE’RE HOME!!!

After 4 ½ months on the road, the Rolling Raub Ranch has come to a temporary halt. We are finally home – for now.

It was like Christmas all over again, with the little ones seeing all their long-since forgotten toys, and us trying to remember where everything was, including the dishes! We arrived home at around 6:00pm last night, and immediately looked over the property. With our 11 acres, it was no small task, but we did it nonetheless! Then we found out that none of us had the key to the house! Within a few minutes, however, someone produced a key which had long been forgotten about, and we went into the house with much trepidation.

Thankfully, everything was in great shape. It was a bit dirty from the hustle of preparing for the trip, but otherwise pretty good. But not for long – we began carrying 4 ½ months worth of accumulation, and it soon turned into a war zone. As of this writing, 11:25 pm the next day, we are slightly dug out, but there is still much to be done.

But for now, we will enjoy being home, and between periods of digging, we will enjoy each others’ company and keep you posted!

Frugal Fridays! Sponsered by Biblicalwomanhoodonline.com

My tip:

Finding inexpensive gas while traveling:

We travel a lot in the ministry, so it is imperative that we find inexpensive gas in the areas we are in, or going to. I just go to http://autos.msn.com/everyday/gasstations.aspx?zip=&src=Netx and plug in the zip code of the area I am in or going to, and it will give me to location of the cheapest gas in that area.

This has been invaluable to us on the road, since every penny saved in the tank is a penny used to feed my 7 kiddos!

Busy times

Never fear; I haven’t forgotten – Has Your Son Asked Yet Part 2 will be forthcoming!

We have been traveling, and are having revival meetings this week. It makes for a very busy day when we have school during the day, prepare all the kiddos (baths, etc.) every afternoon, and meetings during the evening.

The Lord has been gracious in allowing us to sing and preach (my husband, of course,) this week. My Beloved is preaching on the Potter and the Clay – a series of 3 parts.

In the meantime, while I am still writing Part 2, I would love to hear from some of my readers. Please leave a comment so I know that someone is out there! It is strange sometimes to write for a faceless audience – I’d appreciate your comments!

Astrological Sign?

Someone asked me a question about my profile, wondering if the “astrological sign” is the same thing as a zodiac sign or a horoscope.

I just want to let everyone know that I did not put that on my profile personally – it must have come with the blog template. I tried another template, and that had the same thing. This time, when I deleted my birthday – hooray! – the astrological sign disappeared!

No, I strongly oppose zodiac, astrological signs, and horoscopes. These things are open doors to the occult, and I am SO GLAD they are off my profile!!

Thank you, anonymous, for bringing this to my attention.

Has Your Son Asked Yet? Part 1

“And those twelve stones, which they took out of Jordan, did Joshua pitch in Gilgal. And he spake unto the children of Israel, saying, When your children shall ask their fathers in time to come, saying, What mean these stones? Then ye shall let your children know, saying, Israel came over this Jordan on dry land…that all te people of the earth might know the hand of the LORD, that it is mighty: that ye might fear the LORD your God forever.” Joshua 4:20-24

Since we had been driving most of the day, we were all very tired. Most of us were quietly at a missions apartment, enjoying various evening activities. Though I was very busy getting the little ones bathed and ready for bed, I was definitely enjoying not being in the van. It was during this very busy and tired time that one of my sons asked a question I was totally unprepared for: “Why do we do this such-and-such a way? When I was little, you would just tell me that it was bad, but I’m older now, and I would like to know why we do it this way.” Needless to say, I stopped right in my tracks and began to try to explain why we have that particular standard. I soon realized two things: that the explanation would require much more time than I had immediately available, and that my explanation needed to be thought through completely before I could verbalize my beliefs.

You see, standards are like the stones that the children of Israel raised up: they are the outward expression of an important lesson God has taught us. It is an expression of our love for Christ (“if you love me, keep my commandments”) and a practical application of your beliefs (for example, since it is true that God created men and women to be different, then we should dress differently, etc.). Standards are visible “pillars” in our lives that make us different from those who do not know and love the Lord.

But just like the pillar of stone in Israel, one day when our children are old enough, they will wonder why we do things differently. They will one day ask, “why do we do this this way?”

There are two parts to this scenario.

One part shows me that if the parents had been doing their job all along, the son would have no reason to ask – they would already know the answer. In my case, that was part of what shocked me – I thought I had been explaining it to him, but apparently what I have been telling him was just the simple answer I would give a 5 year old. I’ve been saying things like, “we don’t do that, that’s not good. That’s not the way the Lord would have us do it.”

The second part is that your son WILL ask if they don’t already know. They will be curious. They will notice the world around them and wonder why your family does things differently than other families. They may even get to the point where they do not even ask for information, but sometimes as a challenge, “But WHY??”

Knowing that they will ask, or at least will be curious even though they may not even verbalize that curiosity, we as parents need to be prepared to answer any question they may have. Many of us have been children of God for awhile, and we sometimes lose touch with the “why” of what we do. We would be wise to regularly refresh ourselves of the way the Lord has led us. As we tell our children step-by-step how we came to the conclusions we came to many years ago, may the Lord help our children to have understanding hearts in these matters.

Believe me, I am doing some heavy-duty remembering and thinking, as well as praying and searching the Scriptures. And maybe it’ll be the topic of a future entry. But in the meantime, I need to find a chunk of time in my schedule to spend some quality time with my son! J

What Can We DO?

Many people are confused about a very important issue when it comes to training their children. They wonder what they can do to put their children on a godly path. They read everything on child training they can get their hands on, attend numerous seminars, and invest in character training curriculum only to experience deep frustration when their children do not seem to be “getting it.” Though these well-meaning parents have put a lot of effort into guiding their children down the right path, their offspring may very well snub their nose at the whole business and go on their own merry way, leaving the parents to wonder what they did wrong.

The key word to that entire previous paragraph was the words “did,” and “do.” I believe with all my heart that, though what we do is vastly important in the eyes of our children, it is what we ARE that makes them into what they will be. It is not so much what we DO that is important, it is what we ARE.

This is an extremely important concept, which many overlook. That means that for any work of eternal value to occur in the lives of our children, it is virtually wholly dependent on what we ARE as parents, not what we DO, though what we do is also important. We want our children to be godly Christians. ARE we godly Christians ourselves? We want our children to be submissive to God and to us – ARE we submissive to God and to our husbands? We want them to read their Bibles and have a vibrant relationship with God – ARE we living as close to God as we should?

You see, it is much harder to BE different than it is to just DO some different things. We are now talking about our flesh – our stony heart of flesh. In our flesh, we are able to put on a good show and work hard, if necessary. We can determine that we will do a certain thing and make sure it gets accomplished. We can do a very good job at lots of things. But to BE is a different matter. To BE loving, to BE patient, to BE kind, to BE joyful, to BE gentle, to BE longsuffering – that requires the Holy Spirit of God. It would be so easy to write about a method to get children to do something, but to write about getting children to BE something for God requires the parents Being something for God.

There are so many child training methods out there, all of them the subject of much debate. Demand feeding or scheduled feeding? Use the rod, or no? Which curriculum is best? How can we teach them to be responsible? Keep a schedule, or not? Unschooling, or classical education? What should we DO????

The world is loaded with literature on the HOW of child training, and yet, it is the state of BEING of the parents that is the crux point. It is so much easier just to do something good – follow a formula, or a prescribed set of rules or regulations – than it is to BE something good. And this is right where it gets difficult – this issue demands every parent to examine herself, searching her own motives and desires. It goes right to the HEART of the matter.

The Bible says we should “keep our hearts with all diligence, for out of it are the issues of life.” It is the heart which is the parent to what we do, and how we deal with our children. Do we want our children to be patient? You know where I’m going with all this – are WE patient?

So they question is not, “DID you use the rod or didn’t you?” The question is now, “ARE you consistent?” It is not, “DO you have a schedule or not?” The question is now, “ARE you seeking to please the Lord with the use of your time?” The question is not, “DID you do school today?” It is now, “ARE you seeking to do God’s Will today?”

Oh, how we desperately need the Spirit of God to guide and help us as we examine ourselves, and to humble ourselves before Him. Though what we do is vastly important, it is not so much what we do, as what we are!

THERE IS NO PLAN B – PART 2

“My hope is in God…”

Many people think it would be great if their children would grow up to serve God. They seem to think that if their kids go do their own thing, it is no great loss. After all, how can we expect them to live godly lives in this generation? I spoke once with one dear mother of ten, who said, “If just one or two of them turn out for God, then I will be glad!” I thought, Just one or two of them??!!? Which ones are you willing to allow to go to the lions? These kinds of people think that, though living for God is the ideal, it is not really encouraged, nor is it expected. They are surprised when they meet a young person who fervently desires to live his life for God.

In my last post, I mentioned that one of the main helps to me in child training is the absolute necessity of having the help of God! I can not – repeat, can NOT – raise a child for God without His help! If I sense an adverse attitude, I must cry out to Him with an earnest expectation of His help. I do not have another option, there is no plan B.

Then, we must understand that there can be no other option for our children but serving God! Now, I don’t talk to my children and tell them that. I don’t threaten them. But deep down in my heart, I cannot be satisfied with a mediocre Christianity for my children. Whatever they may do with their lives, I want them to be the godliest person they can be. Though they may be a policeman, a plumber, or a homemaker, they must have a living, growing, vibrant relationship with God! They cannot have strength for the journey without it.

Some people seem to think that having children who will serve God after they leave the home would be a great idea. For me, it is an all-consuming passion. It is a day and night, with every breath, vehement desire on my part. This all-encompassing vision drives me to my knees and to the Word of God. I become a student of my students – I study them, searching for slight shades of attitude problems, seeking for guidance from God and godly people. I can leave no stone unturned in my quest to train them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

This all-encompassing desire has two outlets: 1) my relationship with my children, and 2) the passing of values to my children. I cannot, however, have the second without the first. I must have a good relationship with my children before they will embrace the values I show them from the Word of God. These two important missions are completely consuming to me. For me, there is no other option – there is no Plan B.

It is this principle that has led my husband and I as we have made some very hard decisions in our lives. The Lord has helped us get rid of things, add other things, and basically changed us as parents. He has changed not just what we do, but what we are. We cannot be the “normal” American Christian and expect to turn out great spiritual giants for the Lord. We need to be different, in order to make a difference.

Which brings me to my final point: why bother? I mean, why put all this effort into pouring our lives into our children? Someone needs to make an impact on this society for God – someone needs to reach this godless generation. There are more people in the world now than ever before, and less people witnessing – less missionaries, less pastors, less godly Christian workers. This has got to change if we are ever to reach the world for Christ.

Marriages are failing at an incredible rate. We need a generation who knows how to stay together “til death do us part.” We need a generation who will raise another generation for God. We NEED to raise our children to serve God – there is NO PLAN B!

God does not have another option for reaching the world if we don’t do it. There is no army of angels waiting on the sidelines to take over if we fail. He has given us this Great Commission, and we must accomplish it, or die trying! THERE IS NO PLAN B!!